I used to call at Bingo

When I was just a lad

While I enjoyed the feelings

Others called me sad

 

At the church hall you would see me

I must have looked a sight

Shaking up my balls

Every Friday and Saturday night

 

I had to learn the calls

I had to get them straight

From doctors orders number nine

To fat ladies eighty eight

 

Key of the door was twenty one

Twenty was a score

Old age pension sixty five

Two dozen twenty four.

 

Though not politically correct

For this day and age

To use the calls today

Would bring people out in rage

 

It was 10 for a line

And 20 for a house

If some old ladies didn't win

They would come to me and grouse

 

Sometimes for a change

A railway sandwich would be seen

Fill in the top and bottom

But nothing in between

 

Then came the day it ended

I made my final calls

Wrapped up my bag and board

And put away my balls